| Adoptee's Voice |
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There are millions of Americans who are affected by adoption—adoptees,
birth parents, adoptive parents, and even friends and extended family
members. Because there still remains many misconceptions about why
adoptees and birth parents wish to eventually be reunited, I've written a
memoir The Sound of Hope.
A good number of adoptive parents, and society in general, often feel that
birth parents and adoptees don't have the right to search and be reunited.
When a reunion does take place, the common view is for both parties to
simply meet and then get on with their own lives. Birth parents are told,
"Leave your biological children alone, let them live out their lives with the
adoptive families", and the adoptees are told, "Forget your past, your
adoptive parents are your real family now, don't be ungrateful."
And yet, every time someone's adoption status is learned or a birth parent
reveals their secret of relinquishing a child; the first question is, "Are you
ever going to search?" and then, "Aren't you just dying to know where
they are, what they look like?" Obviously searching is important and a
basic human need, otherwise society wouldn't keep asking these
questions over and over.
Adopted individuals and birth parents wish to find each other because
there's simply an innate need to know. As an adoptee, there was a strong
desire throughout my childhood to know where I came from and the
reasons behind my adoption status. Birth parents need to know how their
biological children are faring. As a mother of three children, I know I'd be
devastated if life circumstances forced me to make the decision to place
my own child for adoption. I too, like many birth parents, would be
desperate for any information regarding my child and especially would
want to someday have the opportunity for a reunion.
My sincerest wish is to show adoptive parents and society that it's
unnatural for people to be separated from their family—whether biological
or adoptive. When adoptees decide to search for their birth parents, it
has nothing to do with the adoptive parents, but everything to do with
filling an inner void, a natural and healthy tendency to know your own
history.
Most importantly, I wish to spread the idea that adoptees can forge
healthy relationships between their biological and adoptive families and
it's in the emotional and psychological best interest of all parties in the
adoption triangle to make this their goal.
It's time for my story to be told—the story of an adoptee living in the
closed adoption system— being forced to pick sides—adoptive parents
versus the birth parents. It's time for change...
| The Heart & Soul of Adoption |
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Visit Anne on myspace
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NEW JERSEY Senate Bill 611,
The Adoptee Birthright Bill,
sponsored by Senators Joe Vitale (D-
Middlesex) and Diane Allen (R-
Burlington) was released by a
unanimous vote of the Committee on
Health, Human Services and Senior
Citizens on Thursday, January 24,
2008. Testimony was heard from
Darryl “DMC” McDaniels, of Run-DMC
Hip Hop fame, Adam Pertman,
Director of the Evan B. Donaldson
Adoption Institute, and Fred
Greenman, AAC’s legal adviser.
Anyone with a New Jersey
connection who wants to help lobby
for passage (either a current NJ
resident, or a member of the
adoption constellation who
relinquished, was born or adopted a
child in New Jersey) is encouraged to
be in touch with
pamhasegawa@gmail.com.
For updates on bill status, please go
to www.njleg.state.nj.us and enter
S611 in the “Bill number” box, or go
to www.nj-care.org for more
information.
The Adoptee Birthright Bill,
sponsored by Senators Joe Vitale (D-
Middlesex) and Diane Allen (R-
Burlington) was released by a
unanimous vote of the Committee on
Health, Human Services and Senior
Citizens on Thursday, January 24,
2008. Testimony was heard from
Darryl “DMC” McDaniels, of Run-DMC
Hip Hop fame, Adam Pertman,
Director of the Evan B. Donaldson
Adoption Institute, and Fred
Greenman, AAC’s legal adviser.
Anyone with a New Jersey
connection who wants to help lobby
for passage (either a current NJ
resident, or a member of the
adoption constellation who
relinquished, was born or adopted a
child in New Jersey) is encouraged to
be in touch with
pamhasegawa@gmail.com.
For updates on bill status, please go
to www.njleg.state.nj.us and enter
S611 in the “Bill number” box, or go
to www.nj-care.org for more
information.
Listen to BlogTalkRadio about the upcoming memoir, The Sound of Hope blogtalkradio/AngelLesa |
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| COMING SOON! |